Baru Blek

Baruk blit dari miri, penat alu p xpa la, xsalu camtok. Hehe. Trasa mok polah entri lam bahasa sarawak lok. Hahaha.. Best ehs! :)

Lamak alu xmakan mi kolok, pastok xpat gk mk makan mi kolok nok nyaman cam rah miri. Lol. Kakar kedak org tua. Makan mi jawa kat aseanika and hole no 9, laksa sarawak umah yus, makan cendol and rojak di belakang mega. Nang damn best.

Pasya sempat gik g men futsal kat tempat parking mmc cya. Damn. Nang best jumpa member lamak indah cya. Haha. :) Nice game btw.

Now da blit ada juak best ada juak xbest p apa bole buat la. Huhu. Penat da badan, rasa cam mk type byk gk p, smpey ctok jk la. :)

Wow Durian!

Last evening, I went to SS2 with my mommy to eat durian. We went to Usj19 first just to know that there were no good durian there. My mother decided to go for any eat-all-you-want package but apparently only available in SS2. So there we went.

There were lots of people in SS2 enjoying durian, slurrp. Its been awhile since my last visit here. When owwhhhh?? Ooo, with a friend. We took the package and it costs us RM30 per head. So damn expensive but later I find it worth every cents. Durian served were so delicious with thick content. Lol. We finished about 5 or 6 durians late that evening. Sounds little? The durians were so big.

Funny thing that happened yesterday was, there were these 3 guys, Chinese I think. I think they are sotong, because the way they walk, talk and their appearance. Just my thought at least. They came and sat on the table next to our. One of the guy asked my mum, is it delicious? With his soft tone. My mum said yes, do you want to try? And it continues with blalalalala (long conversation). I just sit there eating. When my mother went to the cashier, the guy look on my face and ask me, " Mana you punya kakak?" I replied with something like this, "Urm, urm, urmmmm, not my kakak, my mom". With a long urm. He then said " Oooooo," and I laughed inside. I told my mom about this when we went back home and we both laugh. I was like, what? my kakak? Hahahaha... Darn, question left for me was, does my mom looks younger than her age? Or do I look old? Hahahaha...

p/s: Durian will affect your day. Beware!

Lemahnya...

Problem memang selalu ada, xkira la dalam famili ke, kapel ke, society ke, kelab ke, bisnes ke, p dapat ke x hadapi? Kalu first time kena prob xpe la, tapi kalu bende same jd lgik nak wat cane? Xkan nak terima je. Cuai name nye. Bodoh pon bole jugak. Memang xde pilihan lain selain face it, or leave it. Sebab kadang2 kepala kalu da tekad, memang lautan api or hutan berduri dilalui. :))

So dalam diri sendiri la, klu da ada prob, mmg just muhasabah diri jalannya. Terima apa nasihat org, tengok apa kesalahan diri, taubat n tawakal. Aiyoyo, banyak nya kesalahan aku yg at last diri sendiri fikir, btol ke ape aku buat nih? Tak hairan la sume bende wat xberkat, diri sendiri da byk sgt prob. :PP

Klu dalam famili lak, ade prob, ketua la yg kene setel. Yang len folo je. Senang. P klu kesalahan same tuh, rotan, sebat, belt, hanger jd hukuman paling cerdas. Hahahaha. Based from my exp.

Lemahnya aku bila sampai prob dengan awek. Gaduh bukan tau tym. Bukan tau ape punca. Just nak gaduh je sebab lame xgaduh. Xcun la camtuh lagi laki memang slalu nya nak cool. Memang la jeles ade bro, p ade gak limit. Ade gak limit tuh, situ la tempat gaduh besar jadi. World War 3. Tapi sumtym nih, bile da gaduh, sorg back off, cakap enuf, dah tatau nak teruskan or x. Hati memang frust, berangin. Tapi xle nak cakap lebeyh sebab da cakap ayat bernas nak back off da. Sedeh, memang sedeh p da org xsudi, xkan nak paksa. :(

Pening pening da kepala. Hati xtenteram. Muka pun monyok je. Tapi daripada filem Love and the Other Drugs yg aku tgk td, ape2 pun jd, life must go on. Bile da kt bawah ni, ingat la ade la blik kt atas nanti. Mayb bukan sekarang tp nanti la kot, klu panjang umur. :) Lagipun lebih penting diri sendiri ada pegangan, ada agama, suma guide ada, complete diajar, tinggal nak ikot je. :)

p/s: Sekadar nak happy kan diri yang luka lara nih.

I am not sure

I woke up today with my mind thinking hard about so many things. Thing I am not sure myself. But mostly about my relationship. I had tried to really commit myself into this relationship but I have not see or feel any gain for me. When misunderstanding happened, I just do not know what I should really say or do because I am not sure where all of this start. Everything seems not right.

When I ask before about stuffs, I thought that stuffs have been explained to me completely. But yesterday, it haunted me back, little by little, crawling with new fact. Now I am not sure did I really understood with the problem in the first place. Damn :(

I think I had given many chances to explain, and now its time for me to just let it be. I just do not want to know about stuffs anymore. When stuffs are past, please let it stay in the past. Now I know the truth, all things seems start to resolve one by one. What questions I had in mind, surprisingly answered. I am living in the present, why present must be much worser that past? Duhh~

I made up my mind last night, its time for me living in reality. No more fantasy please Hilmi. Do not hope for fairy tales. It ends here.

p/s: Wanna play HoN also distracted already. Lol

Pening2 Lalat

Kepala pening, nak buat personal statement malas, bila nak start, tak tahu.

InterStudy dah hantar emel suruh settle kan application cepat2, Alamak!

Ada personal statement lama tapi tak tahu boleh terima or tidak, mmg Zzz.

Terfikir sendiri bila lah nak siap nih.

Semakin pening, tengok skrin monitor Samsung, tak ada apa2 yang menarik.

Tggu punya tggu, siap jugak akhirnya Warrior's Way, wow,

Tengok punya tengok, bosan la pulak, tido la kejap.

Terbangun dengan kebisingan babak fighting memang tambah bosan.

Kusut masai, sudahla bosan, plus lagi dengan perasaan stress.

Buat apa2 pun salah, xfokus, serba xkena, apa la yang ada di dalam fikiran.

Mungkin diri sendiri xfaham perasaan dalam hati atau jalan cerita.

Apa sebenarnya terjadi, tak tahu dan mahu tahu.

Lol... :D

Appreciating

Sometimes all we need is a little of appreciation. Maybe because of what we did, or what we say, or anything that can be appreciated. It can be shown with words, actions or thoughts perhaps. I do remember how to appreciate people around me that need a little encouragement. Because I do need some appreciation from people around me to let myself know that I am exist to them.

I feel grateful with all I have that have been given by Allah but sometimes my little heart just full with greed, lust, envy, which put me into this uncertain unpleasant feeling. These feelings make me forget to appreciate. Or maybe I have not been appreciated well enough? I dont know. Maybe yes maybe no. But in any way, I am thankful enough. I know very much I am easily hurt. But I learn the hard way to make myself stronger than yesterday. All by myself. I know those who hold to his patience would win someday in this game. :)

P/s: Am I too clingy? I thought it is okay. But apparently not. :D

“The greatest of all gifts is the power to estimate things at their true worth”

François de la Rochefoucauld quotes (French classical author, leading exponent of the Maxime, 1613-1680)

Morning small laugh

I woke up texting my girlfriend. I asked her something like this, is it ok if I put high expectation in our relationship. I asked this kind of question because of curiosity, insecurity (maybe?), and just mere question. She replied, lets try, love dont come if we force it, it comes naturally. I dont know how to reply to that. :)

I give it some thought. Maybe I am closing myself up. I need to open my mind to see whats outside there. Hee~ In my head, one song keep on repeating, Jangan Bilang Tidak. Lol. I laugh a bit. Aiyo, I wonder how selfish I have been.

p/s: Bangun pagi gosok gigi cuci muka dan mandi... (teringat lagu tym kecik)